To the guy who invented zero, thanks for nothing.

I have the perfect spot for your face

The amount of lingerie I have is a real problem

Seven days without a pun makes one weak.

It doesn’t really fit.

My skin hates the sun. So the veins are always poppin’

No clothes necessary today.

A snake walks into a bar and the bartender asks, how did you do that?

Hide and seek champion right here. [OC]

Remember boys, no points for second place.

This is my costume. I’m a homicidal maniac. They look just like everybody else.

I found a wooden shoe in my toilet today. It was clogged.

When I was a kid, my mom told me I could be anyone I wanted to be. Turns out, identity theft is a crime.

A chiropractors favorite music is hip pop.

Dear math, grow up and solve your own problems.

I got fired from this canned juice company. Apparently I couldn’t concentrate.

Did you expect that?

Good morning!

How is everyone doing this fine Thursday?

Setting them free

Let’s stay in bed today.

The left one always coming out to say hi.

I can’t with this heat. Can it be fall yet?

The black and white is really 🤌💋