Dear math, grow up and solve your own problems.

Quasimodo was the best detective in France. He always had a hunch. [OC]

Remember boys, no points for second place.

A friend asked how many fish I caught. I told him it’s not polite to fish and tell.

Did you think I could reveal these behind a blazer?

I found a wooden shoe in my toilet today. It was clogged.

When I was a kid, my mom told me I could be anyone I wanted to be. Turns out, identity theft is a crime.

A chiropractors favorite music is hip pop.

Becoming a vegetarian is just one big missed steak.

Melons have weddings because they cantaloupe.

I bought a boat because it was for sail.

I almost poked my eye out with the sweatshirt string on this reveal.

I got fired from this canned juice company. Apparently I couldn’t concentrate.

Did you expect that?

Drop the pants. It’s a no pants party!

I could tell a joke about pizza, but it’s a little cheesy.

Good morning!

How is everyone doing this fine Thursday?

Drop the shirt. We won’t need it where we’re going.

Setting them free

How many shakes does it take to get to the nip slip?

A towel reveal for your weekend.

I can’t with this heat. Can it be fall yet?

You tell me if this post has anything to do with Earth Day 🌎