Ten-thousand Orcs now stand between Frodo and Mount Doom. I've sent him to his death.

I’m looking for a Jedi in the streets, but a Sith in the sheets.

Darth Vader probably liked his toast a bit on the Dark Side 🍞

A hobbit was not watching where he was going and he bumped into the wizard. He said, "Saruman, didn't see you there"! 🧙🏻‍♂️

I'm not a Sith, because I can't bring balance to anything apparently

I saw a falcon eating avocado toast. I guess it’s a millennial falcon 🥑

I think General Grievous’ favorite band had to be Weezer 🤷🏼‍♀️

Help me Obi-Wan Kenobi, you're my only hope.

I went to a sale at the Darth Maul. Everything was half off.

I never made it to Mount Doom. There was always one Mordor to go through.

Faithless is he that says farewell when the road darkens 🧝🏻‍♀️

I couldn't enter Sauron's lair, there was always one Mordor to go through 🧙🏻‍♂️

I thought maybe we could make gingerbread houses, and eat cookie dough, and go ice skating, and maybe even hold hands.

Jedi in the streets, Sith in the sheets.

Lets play harry Potter. I'll be Hedwig, and and you can play with my Hooters 🪄

Lets play Empire Strikes Back, because I'm ready to get Hoth and heavy.

I'm not an Orc, but I'll taste your man flesh 🧝🏻‍♀️

I'm not Jamie Lanister, but I'll show you why they call me Kingslayer.

Let me show you how anything is Kim Possible.....

I feel a great disturbance in my pants…

Faithless is he that says farewell when the road darkens.

You must be a Tri Wizard Champion, because my Goblet is on Fire.

Pale booty, red hair and a slight jiggle. I'm the whole package.

Big booty redheads [f]uck the best 🦊